I am a Trauma Informed Embodiment Coach. Healing is possible for women who have trauma. Big T, Little T, Complex, Sexual, Religious, any form of trauma. Check out my content and ways we can work together.
Not Every Tool Works Every Time - When mediation isn't working...
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I am starting an email Series called... Not Every Tool Works Every Time (I will try to answer all the questions I've been asked about this and will address any more you want to send in via email or any messages through messenger or DM on my socials). My clients are often asking me, what tool to use next when their "go to" tool isn't working. Or they want to know what tool they can use every time....and know that it will work every time. And you might not what to hear this, but NO Tool works every time. Healing doesn't work that way. Can you give yourself some grace and understanding if you want this? Me too, I want this at times too. And my body is changing. My mind is changing. My trauma and how and when is shows up is the same and also different. (My trauma will tell me it's exactly the same). And I also, know the difference is that I am not in the same exact place in time or space each time it shows up, even if it is the same narrative or response. And as we heal...different layers of our trauma can often be revealed. And so... My trauma is changing too. When we know this information, I'd offer something to get curious about.... Can it also be true that we need different tools at different times? And that we might need to adapt a favorite tool to fit these changes? I also want to offer that healing is not a one size fits all and the ideas I will offer here are ones that I invite you to try out. You can read them and see which ones resonate and which ones your body is drawn too. You can let your body tell you which ones you want to try first or not at all. Today, we will talk about meditation.... And even if it's not a full meditation, it's the idea that, "I want to calm down a bit or get more centered and what usually helps me do that is some meditative stillness". So whether it is a full sit down, ready to meditate.... Or a pause in my day with a hand on my belly or heart..... There is a desire to connect to self. To calm or center self through some form of meditation...... BUT.....What if I'm hyper aroused and in a state of fight or flee, Or super shut down and in freeze? FIGHT/FLEE Settling into a stillness practice in this highly alert state, might not feel right and definitely might not feel calming, centering or safe. If this is the case - even IF normally meditation is your jam - there are other things we can do to consciously offer a calming effect to our wanting to fight or run sensations and feelings. Often we need to help release the fight or flee energy first and then slowly lower our energy levels. It's important to note that we are not going fully into the fight or flee and doing whatever our trauma tells us to do....we are adding a conscious part. And the conscious part is powerful because it helps us get out of our "trauma (survival) being in charge" state. I invite you to see if you or your body like any of these ideas...
The powerful part of these actions are when we do them with intentionality. We might start out quickly, and then start to slow the action down as the fight or flee energy leaves our body. Or if the energy ramps up we can choose to start quick and then go in quicker and then slow down. FREEZE And, if you are feeling shut down or in freeze, a full stillness mediation might not be best because it could send you farther into a state of shut down. We can offer ourselves a lot of movement or small subtle movements. How does your body like to come out of freeze, slowly or more quickly. You can honor your experience here. There is no right or wrong. I invite you to see if you or your body like any of these ideas, instead of a meditative stillness practice...
These actions help us offer ourselves mobility and movement which helps the freeze response cycle complete. Completing any trauma cycle means it moves through and out of our body. I invite you to give it a try and see how you.....and your body responds. You might have a lot of thoughts, some helpful and some not so helpful... If unhelpful......can you be kind to yourself? You are going through some trauma processing. And if you are still aching to meditate...and your body is aching for that stillness meditation practice.... It might be just what you need to finish your processing. Trust You. Remember, ❤️ You Matter. Your Healing Matters. You Are Worth It! P.S. This is the first email in my Not Every Tool Works Every Time Series. I'll be answering all the questions I've been asked so far and will address any more you want to send in via email or any messages through messenger or DM on my socials. Click one of the icons above. P.S.S. If you want more practice Getting Into Your Body, my Monthly Class is happening Friday. (Note the day change.) |
Hi! I'm Cami
I am a Trauma Informed Embodiment Coach. Healing is possible for women who have trauma. Big T, Little T, Complex, Sexual, Religious, any form of trauma. Check out my content and ways we can work together.
Not Every Tool Works Every Time Series Continued... This is the last week of this series. Over the course of this last month we’ve talked about when different bottom up tools don’t work and what to do. When.... Meditation Vagal Stimulation Noticing Sensations Don't Work. I also shared what to do when Trauma Education doesn’t work. And today, I’d like to share what to do when the Sideways tool doesn’t work. Sideways means the watcher. It’s how we view our trauma triggers in our body and all...
Not Every Tool Works Every Time Series Continued... Learning about trauma can be really helpful. In fact, trauma education is on my list of Top Down tools because it can explain why we act certain ways. When trauma takes over, we can understand that we are not crazy, we’re just reacting to what happened to us. And, even if other people don’t get it, learning about trauma can be a way to help them understand us better. But it’s important to remember, we’re not learning about trauma to convince...
Not Every Tool Works Every Time Series Continued... In the work of healing trauma, I often invite others (and myself) to notice different things in our body. To notice, means to pay attention. To turn inward. I share something and offer a noticing practice by asking you to notice what is happening in your body.... Or notice what is not happening.... And notice what your mind or heart might be doing.... And notice your breath.... This is a short list of things we could notice. And any of these...